for more positivity in anyone’s life, I also believe that blind
optimism does more harm than good.
I have hit a new level of stress in my life, which is saying something
- I have had some less than great luck in the past 23 years. But I
feel like right now, this is the worst of things. And bits and pieces
of the puzzle will fall into place hopefully sooner than later, but
time never seems to be on my side these days. As much as I
desperately want to put on my happy face and say "the sun WILL come
out tomorrow!", that doesn't restock my freezer with Banquet frozen
dinners, or keep my cell phone from getting shut off. And even when
I put all those materialistic/money woes aside, I am still
left with a shaky foundation of not knowing if anything in my life
will ever be the same.
My family is undoubtedly the strongest support system I have. Always
have been, always will be. My brothers are rock solid in any
situation. And even if they aren't, they keep it together long enough
to ensure the rest of us are okay. My mother makes me feel like I
have nothing worth bitching about, this woman has had nothing but bad
news for the past 2 years and pushes through anything stronger than
any woman I have ever known. My sister - bless her 19 year old heart.
She is so full of love and unjaded optimism, immediately pushing her
own fears aside to see what can be done to make any situation better.
"It's when you cry just a little, and you laugh in the middle that
you've made it." -Jason Mraz
My father has taught me more than anyone else that laughter makes
anything better. He's up against a lot right now, but his comedic
timing has been spot on since this started. He never downplays the
situation, but he'll find the funniest part of it, and make you smile
no matter how impossible that may seem at the time.
We are all going to be okay. I am going to be okay. It's not going
to be easy. I'm exhausted physically and mentally like I've never
been before. Work seems to be more stressful than usual, my
relationship isn’t the most ideal circumstance at times, and having a
fast approaching moving day hangs heavy over my head always. But food
always seems to find a way into my belly, and I manage to be at work every day
when I am supposed to be (roughly) without a car of my own. My friends have
been outstanding, they keep me laughing. And the boyfriend's kisses are just as
butterfly inducing as they were 3 months ago.
It could always be worse. Maybe I don’t need to be the most optimistic person,
as long as I always keep my perspective.
I like the part about appreciating your family and the part about laughing makes anything better... its why I make jokes even when sometimes with bad timing, because if I can make one person laugh I made whatever issue we were in a little better then it was
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