Girls, Girls, Girls

I have always bragged openly about my group of guy friends.  The same guys that I made friends with in 7th grade, that I still call my best friends today. We have picked up a few other guys in our circle over the years - but I'm a guy's girl.  I like doing boy things.  I like playing drinking games, wrestling on the lawn, and sitting on the couch for hours of Call of Duty tournaments.  I guess having two older brothers would explain my preference to keeping the company of men.  I spent my earlier years desperately trying to be cool enough to hang out with my brothers and their friends, that by the time I reached high school I had become the girl that just fit better with boys as friends.

"I hate girls" has been the go to phrase for years as people would inquire why I don't keep the company of lady friends.  I don't hate all girls, just most.  I've always employed one female friend to keep at my side over the years.  And they have come and gone due to falling outs, moving away, all the typical circumstances that come in the way of friendships.  But I never really lost sleep over it because I didn't really think I needed to have a close girlfriend as long as I had my boys.

Over the past year I have found myself keeping the company of more female friends.  And I feel like I've been missing out on what having girl friends offer that is so dramatically different than the things I have always had in my relationships with males.  Girls aren't bad.  I have just always been so insecure that having another female close to me is a mirror to all the things I don't have, don't do well, or don't do right at all.  I guess I have just finally come to a point in my life where I am a little more self assured, or perhaps ready to learn from the females around me how to resolve the shortcomings that I do so clearly have.

I don't want to discount any of my previous female friends, because the ones I held close (and still do) helped me through a lot of growing.  And I would never dream of replacing my bros with an all female cast.  But I have been having sleepovers lately with Chelsea, ones were we can lie around bralass, watch hours of television, drink mimosas and talk about boys.  Just this past weekend I got to spend the night laughing and drinking wine with Erin and Beth.  When I go to bars and clubs now, and I am with women, I have an opportunity to meet people.  Unlike when I would frequent places with a group of boys.  Men just naturally assume I am sleeping with one or more of them.

I was talking to the Tetris Piece guy today  (welcome to your blog name, buddy) and he mentioned what a red flag it is when a girl doesn't have any girlfriends.  And I totally get it now.  All the times I spent thinking I didn't need consistent female interactions; I was the worst possible version on myself.  Being around dudes is great for my self esteem.  Whether they are treating me like a girl, in those times I am the only girl.  Or when they are treating me like one of the guys, I am cool enough to be with the guys.

Adam and I used to have full-fledged slapping contests.  I would, on a semi-regular basis, get slapped across the face at full force.  And I loved it.  I loved that it didn't phase him that I had lady parts, but rather I was Katie Keller, and I can take a hit to the face just like a bro.  Travis has body slammed me into hard surfaces more than most professional wrestlers experience throughout their careers. I wouldn't trade being one of the guys for anything in the world.  On the other hand, I haven't been able to talk to the guys about that dude I was with a few weeks ago that was an unnecessarily rough kisser (this coming from the girl that likes a good choking).  Or talk about missing HSF as much as I do, or the residual feelings from my misguided one night stand.  Or what it feels like to have love/hate relationship with a younger sister.  Or someone to call up terrified when your period is a few days late.

I'm glad I finally appreciate the company of girl friends, and I am even more happy that I have managed to find a group of them that are just as boyish as I am at times.  And never make me feel like less of a girl for having my more masculine tendencies.  So if you are one of those girls that "doesn't get along with other girls" try harder, I promise when you find the good ones you'll see not all girls are bad. And if anything, you'll like triple your wardrobe.